I have a blogger's block.

For the past two weeks I've literally been writing drafts on drafts on drafts. And then, when I'm halfway, I go through thoughts like... do people even want to read this? do I want it (it being my emotions, thoughts, & feelings) out there? why am I even writing this? and the list goes on. Then I just stop typing or even worse, just delete the whole thing altogether.

I don't know what's with me. A lot internally, I guess. So, in the old school "tumblr" version of myself... I'm just gonna let it out there. (Down the rabbit hole I go...)


I stopped working out... again. (Ugh, I know. I'm annoyed at myself.) I have such a struggle keeping up a routine. I'm trying to get myself out of this rut, but ever since the weather changed, I'm even more tired than I use to be. I tried running after work, but then couldn't because it got too hot. Excuse after excuse, I let myself go a little and gained 5-6 pounds back. I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but when you've previously lost 20 pounds and then you gain 25% back... it's a little of a let down.

Then recently, I got sick. Like high fever, chills in the middle of the night, body aches that I can't move kind of sick. In the middle of summer. I know. Needless to say, it was not fun. And of course, like a snowball effect, I got all sad. For a lot of random, unimportant, and frankly, dumb things. but that was me. ALL. OVER. AGAIN.

Then I remembered something I saw (I forget where, but probably Pinterest or Instagram)...

Once again, it's one of those easier said than done mantras... but it can be done. And every time I become out of focus, I will do my best to reel back it in. I have so many things I still want to do in life. I have so many goals yet to achieve. I got so caught up in life, and so focused on the negative that I forgot to be positive! (What a epiphany!)

With the blogger's block I've been having, I get so worried and I get caught up thinking about if it's good enough, or is it too vulnerable, or whatever the case may be. But what I need to do is to push through the negativity and darkness, and press on until I see the light.

So that's what I'm going to do. Not try. But do. (Mind over matter.)
-Gardenia Rose