May 4, 2013: I graduated from college.

It's already been that long ago, but it feels like it just happened. Bachelor's of Science in Nursing with a Minor in Business Administration. That sounds so serious. But ugh, look at me. I look so happy. Excited. As they say... bright-eyed and bushy tailed. The thing that I worked so hard for years was finally done. I have a degree. Looking at that photo, I have mixed feelings about it. Why? Because I'm not where I'm suppose to be I thought I would be.


I have a weird uncomfortability with my career right now. I know that God is doing a work that I can't see and I can't understand. I'm trying to be okay with that. I really am. This funky feeling though... it just comes and goes. And lately, it's coming more than going. And when it gets bad, I go through the struggle. I binge eat and don't take care of myself like I should, but I snap out of it or at the least try to. I'm actually in the middle of attempting to do that. Right. Now. I know this too shall pass... but I just want to know when. Deep breaths, Gardenia. Deep breaths.

May 3, 2013: I got engaged.


You can tell by my face that I'm in shock. Because I definitely did NOT see that coming. We told each other at the end of 2014 or maybe even 2015, we'll get married. Well obviously, that was not the case. I remember watching the slideshow thinking... awww how cute! They're showing pictures of Lorenzo and me. Oh wait, why is it just us... over and over... Omg, I hope my parents are okay with so many pictures of us... this is a lot... And before I knew it, his cute face holding up those four words flashed on the screen and he gets down on one knee in front of me.

To this day, and even as I type this, I have a smile on my face. Every time I tell it. Every time Amelia and Monica laugh about Monica and Manny almost missing it. Every time I see pictures and see that my sister, Ate Christine, and Joshua are so happy too. When Cea (Camille) and Jea are like "why didn't we know? #plottwist." When I finally got to read all the texts between Mycah and Lorenzo about it. I have a smile on my face.

There's not a day that I regret this decision. Now, I'm not saying marriage is all flowers and rainbows (because it's most definitely not), but even if it's not easy, I'm so glad I'm living life with him by my side. #TeamGardenzo. #AllDay.

-Gardenia Rose